Well, I do eat hot dogs occasionally since they're low fat and pretty cheap, and it suddenly occurred to me that it's entirely possible to make something a lot like an octodog with an 8-segment wire cutter gizmo from a mandolin. So this was my lunch a few days ago; The eyes were peppercorns, the blasphemous yellow ichor was mustard...

If I do this again I'll probably use something else for the eyes, not quite sure what yet. Possibly capers or cloves? Suggestions gratefully received anyway.