Went to collect the D50 and lens at lunch time. Camera shop says "Ah... we moved all of our auction stuff out of London on Monday." Went back to work, checked eBay again. Item description definitely says the local shop. Phone their auction people, shout a bit. They're going to send it to me postage free, should reach me early next week, and I've made it quite clear that if it's in any way defective or damaged it's going straight back to them.